Yard Sale

Got a gun loaded and he don't even know it
But I'm about to go sell him out
Shooting hot pink signs on poles and power lines
Covering every single inch of this town
Then I'll go back, relax, lawn chair, feet up,
Yeah I got price tags, trash bags full of his stuff

I'm having a yard sale
Everything must go
I'll give you a good deal
On a rack of his clothes
If it's got a sticker on it
It's as good as gone, call it
Heartbreak retail
I'm having a yard sale

I bet his sixty inch screen's gonna look pretty sweet
On the wall in my neighbor's house
And when someone gets their hands on these new Ray-Bans
He bought down in Chinatown
I hope next time he lies he thinks twice
'Cause cheating comes with a high price

I'm having a yard sale
Everything must go
I'll give you a good deal
On a 67 Epiphone
If it's got a sticker on it
It's as good as gone, call it
Heartbreak retail
I'm having a yard sale
Oh-oh-oh-oh,
I'm having a yard sale

Make me an offer I'll be here all day
After 30 minutes, everything is free
I've got a leather couch, fishing pole,
Beer mug, cell phone,
Old records I've had, power drills, so sad
A Harley, Frye boots, bed heel boo...

I'm having a yard sale
Everything must go
I'll give you a good deal
On a rack of his clothes
If it's got a sticker on it
It's as good as gone, call it
Heartbreak retail
I'm having a yard sale
I'm having a yard sale
I'm having a yard sale