Where Was I When They Passed Out Luck?

Where was I?
When they passed out brains?
Right at the head of the line!
Where was I?
When they passed out talent?
Right up front, getting mine!
But when it came to the line where they handed out luck...
Where was your smart clever friend?
Back showing off my talent and brains...
to the bums lining up at the end!

Where was I?
When they passed out looks?
Needless to say I was there!
Who'd deny...
in the charm department,
I got more than my share!
But when the time rolled around and they handed out luck...
Where was your good lucking clown?
Off trying out my profile and charm...
on a girl in a neighboring town!

I sure got a great sense of humor! (Ah haha!)
The day they were passing the pot.
I sure got a great sense of humor! (Ah haha!)
...And I need all I got!

Where was I when they passed out guts?
Mister! I opened the store!
I'm the guy... who invented the chutzpah!
Show me a guy who's got more!
But when they yelled "Get your luck! 'Cause It's running out fast!
Step up and get your supply!"

Me, with my brains
and talent
and looks
Blew the one thing you need to get by!
Where was I? Where was I? Where was I?
Where waasssss IIIIII?

(spoken)
Seriously...Where was I?