We Only Read the Headlines

You can cut to the chase
And you know its okay
'Cause we only read the headlines
We only read the headlines

Baby get to the point
And quit the foreplay
We only read the headlines
We only read the headlines anyways

54 percent of bank robberies take place on a Friday
Women blink nearly twice as much as men
Elvis never ever gave an encore
The number of wars fought between countries
That both have at least one McDonald's is zero

Every 5 minutes an area of rain forest
The size of a foot ball field is eliminated
Women who read romance novels
Have sex twice as often as those who dont

Did you know? That a can of Diet Coke will float in water
While a can of regular Coke will sink
The Muppet Show was banned from TV in Saudi Arabia
Because one of its stars was a pig
Males on average think about sex every 7 seconds

More than 50 percent of the people in the world
Have never made or received a telephone call
Syphilis has risen 500 percent in the last six years in Europe
Why is it that everybody seems to get older except for Cliff Richard?

You can cut to the chase
And you know its okay
'Cause we only read the headlines
We only read the headlines

Baby get to the point
And quit the foreplay
We only read the headlines
We only read the headlines anyways

1 out of 10 girls under 20 is carrying Chlamydia
According to several sources, Dr. Harvey Kellogg
Actually tried to make a cure for masturbation when he made cornflakes
Women are 30 percent more sexually active during a full moon
Indonesia is the country with the highest Scout membership

In every single episode of Seinfeld, theres a superman
In at least one scene somewhere
If you weighed all the animals in the world
Hens would be 10 percent of the total weight

In Minnesota theres a law against men having sex with living fish
Jimmy Carter can read 2000 words per minute
Humans and dolphins are the only species
That have sex for pleasure
Danny DeVito is taller than Dolly Parton

You can cut to the chase
And you know its okay
We only read the headlines
We only read the headlines

In the papers on the news
Heaven heard is no excuse
In formations everywhere
All you need to know is right here

Its possible to attend your own funeral
Because the human brain continues
To send out electrical wave signals
For up to 37 hours following death

We only read the headlines
We only read the headlines
We only read the headlines
We only read the headlines

You can cut to the chase
And you know its okay
'Cause we only read the headlines
We only read the headlines

Baby get to the point
And quit the foreplay
We only read the headlines
We only read the headlines anyways