Vanish

Vanish in the world around me
Leaving ash and bone
My crown of thorns that shows no mercy
But its my own
I grace these walls with all my failures
What have I become?

I think its time for my forgiveness
Lick these wounds to heal
Im losing faith, the silent poison
Pain Id like to feel
I know its time
Lay down, surrender
Someone take control

Cause Im afraid to love
Cause Im afraid Ill leave
Im living with these lies
That only I believe

And I dont want to walk
But I dont want to run
Cause Im afraid of failing
In front of everyone

Hold me down and hurt my feelings
I wont do the same
Ill cry in silent disappointed
Taking all the blame
But darkest hour always finds me
Pulling far away

Cause Im afraid to win
Cause I dont wanna lose
And Im afraid of falling
Under harsh review

And Im afraid to live
And Im too tired to try
I hide behind these shadows
Turn off all the lights

This never ending longing feeling
Waiting to be loved
I still believe in In forever
But it never comes

Im afraid to love
Cause Im afraid Ill leave
Im living with these lies
That only I believe

And Im afraid to walk
But I dont wanna run
And Im afraid of hurting
Myself and everyone