Surprise

My conscience finally got to me
Workin' sixty hours a week
Leavin' her alone, bored to death at home
So, one day, I asked off early

I dropped that bottle of wine
When I flipped on the light
You can't imagine my

Surprise, they were havin' a real good time
Yeah, I nearly lost my mind
When I saw the leather an' spikes around her neck

An' he was handcuffed to my bed
An' I thought he was my friend
Guess, it was all lies, yeah, surprise

The judge gave her all I had
An' he did the same for my old friend
Yeah, his Lexus an' his house all went to his spouse
So, when I moved out, he just moved in

He went back to get his drawers
At the place he lived before
Guess who answered the door?

Surprise, I hooked up with his ex-wife
Who's prettier an' sweeter than mine
Now, we're livin' his XRI Jacuzzi bath

Yeah, we just sit back in them bubbles an' laugh
While they're livin' in my run down shack
Yeah, serves 'em right, surprise

Surprise, surprise, yeah, that trip to Mali sure was nice
Oh, in Vegas, we rolled the dice
Now, it's steak an' taters every night

Next weekend, yeah, we're headed off to Disneyland
Yeah, I knew he was rich but now
Hell, I can retire, surprise