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Here they come down main
Drums a flailin' and the sirens a wailin', a roar!
Bands are a and flags are a wavin'
And the Vanguards and Motorcycle

Clowns are a clownin' to the
And every pretty girl who dares to smile
It's a glorious mess, wears a fez
The parade stretches out for a

a typical American phenomenon
Where all the have a fine old time
It's the Forty-Third Annual
Of the Grand Mystic Royal
Of the Nobles of the Ali Baba Temple of the

Meanwhile, at the motel

"Operator, give me room 321,
Hello, Lumpkin?
This here is the Potentate
I said the illustrious Potentate
The illustrious, Coy!"

"Dad blame it! here's Bubba!
Coy, why you at the parade?
What? Well, how'd you get that big
Up there in room?"

"What? I hear ya' Coy!
Quit it up, boy! Turn it off!
Listen, I want you to know one thing
You have embarrassed us all, the whole delegation! "

"Now see you at the banquet tonight, son
And you be Coy, you hear me?
Black tie! Seven o'clock! Be Coy!
And Coy, don't answer the phone, udden!"

Well, it was all arranged by the Auxiliary
In the Convention hall
Cold roast beef, string beans, mashed
And nine boring in all

And all the tables looked fine with their Mogen David
And Chrysanthemums on side
And the Hahira leaders in rented tuxedos
Made the hearts swell with pride

It's a typical American
Where all the members a fine old time
It's the Forty-Third Convention
Of the Grand Royal Order
Of the of the Ali Baba Temple of the Shrine

Meanwhile, back at the

"Operator, 321, Thank You!
Hello, Coy? are you doin'?
do you mean, who is this?
This is Bubba? Why you at the banquet?"

"What do you all you had to wear
Was a Hawaiian shirt?
Well, you may think you're foolin' some
But I what's goin' on"

"Yeah, everybody the little redhead
right, everybody!
Why she come through the dinner
in the middle of the pineapple sherbet"

"Didn't have on but your fez, Coy!
Coy, you the one who's got a fez with a propeller on top!
Yeah, and she was a yellin' out the secret code too, Coy
We gonna have to it now, Coy! Dad, blame it, Coy!"

"We gonna to have a special meetin', we get back to Hahira
About your conduct at this convention! Embarrassin'!
Now Coy, you be at the conclave tonight, you hear me?
And Coy, it a secret! Huh!"

Well, it was a secret meeting in the dead of the
With mysterious
In with prescribed
Rituals of time ceremony

of grave concern
Were weighed with caution
whether or not to raise at stud
Or or spit in the ocean

It's a typical American
Where all the members have a fine old
It's the Forty-Third Annual
Of the Mystic Royal Order
Of the Nobles of the Ali Baba of the Shrine

Meanwhile, at the motel

"Operator, 320
How, you know?
Oh! Hello Coy! Where have you
No, you at the meeting!"

"Well, I out that at three o'clock this mornin'
You was out there, in fruit of the looms
In the motel pool with a bunch
Of them waitresses from the Lounge!"

"I just hope Charlene find out about this, Coy!
What? Well, you get that big motorcycle
Up there on the high dive,
Now Coy, Dad it, that ain't no way to act"

"We to be pillars of the community
When we get back to Hahira, you can turn in your ring
And your tie 'cause Coy, hehe, you are out of the shrine!
You be blackballed, Coy! That's right!"

"You may have to your bags and leave town!
do you mean, you might join the Hell's Angels?
Coy! you hang up on me!
you crank that motorcycle!"

"Who's that gigglin' in the background,
Hello, hello operator! Yeah, we's cut off! 321
Coy! you hang up on the illustrious Potentate!
I said the Potentate!
is Bubba! Bubba! Coy! Coy!"

Videos

Ray Stevens - "Shriner's Convention" (Music Video) [from Get Serious]
Ray Stevens - "Shriner's Convention" (Music Video) [from Get Serious]
Ray Stevens - Shriner's Convention (Original)
Ray Stevens - Shriner's Convention (Original)
Shriner's Convention (Ray Stevens) w/ lyrics
Shriner's Convention (Ray Stevens) w/ lyrics
Ray Stevens - "Shriner's Convention" (with opening, Live in Branson, MO)
Ray Stevens - "Shriner's Convention" (with opening, Live in Branson, MO)
Ray Stevens - "Shriner's Convention" (Official Audio)
Ray Stevens - "Shriner's Convention" (Official Audio)
Ray Stevens - Shriner's Convention (Knights Of Columbus Version)
Ray Stevens - Shriner's Convention (Knights Of Columbus Version)
Ray Stevens - "Shriner's Convention" (Live on CabaRay Nashville)
Ray Stevens - "Shriner's Convention" (Live on CabaRay Nashville)
Shriner's Convention
Shriner's Convention
30th Anniversary digital remaster of Ray Stevens  "Shriner's Convention."
30th Anniversary digital remaster of Ray Stevens "Shriner's Convention."
Ray Stevens - The Shriners Convention
Ray Stevens - The Shriners Convention
Ray Stevens - "Shriner's Convention" (Live at Casino Rama, 2015)
Ray Stevens - "Shriner's Convention" (Live at Casino Rama, 2015)
Ray Stevens - Shriners Convention (Live)
Ray Stevens - Shriners Convention (Live)
Shriner's Convention (Live)
Shriner's Convention (Live)
Ray Stevens - "The Mississippi Squirrel Revival" (Music Video)
Ray Stevens - "The Mississippi Squirrel Revival" (Music Video)
Ray Stevens Live in Branson 1992
Ray Stevens Live in Branson 1992
First Time Reaction to Ray Stevens - Shriner's Convention
First Time Reaction to Ray Stevens - Shriner's Convention
Ray Stevens - "The Cannonball Run Opening"
Ray Stevens - "The Cannonball Run Opening"
Ray Stevens - Shriners convention +  backstory on how Shriners loved the song
Ray Stevens - Shriners convention + backstory on how Shriners loved the song
Ray Stevens - Grandpa Voted Democrat
Ray Stevens - Grandpa Voted Democrat
The Best Of Ray Stevens
The Best Of Ray Stevens