Melatonin

I try to sleep to the beating of drums
To the grinding of teeth
To syndication
But I wake up angry
Fearful, manic

I try to sleep to the HVAC hum
To the fast dissolve tablets
Of melatonin and I tried
To be grounded, balanced

You know me so well
How low is your bottom
I tried all by best to be transparent, militant, eye contact, intimate

I try to sleep with a rose in my teeth
For a cold comfort Christ
Who refuses to eat
And I wake up panicked
Worried, catholic

I watched you scream at the top of your lungs
On the merits of lying
And self-medication
And I cried
It was hopeless

You know me so well
How low is your bottom
I've seen worse, but come on
And I tried all my best, to forget about it