Joining A Fan Club

She turned the night light on and blew him a kiss
He stared back through his green Crayola eyes
She traced his likeness from off the back of a disc
Next to the boxtop promise of the biggest prize

Joining a fan club with my friends
Filling our bathtubs with teeshirts and 8 x 10's
He looks so dreamy, I'm in love from afar
When I'm pickin' up a fallen star

Downstairs the late show's blastin' 'Age of the rock'
Greedy monks playin' last Sunday at the Milky Way
Mom's writing checks to the minister in the corner
Singing, 'Dig Down Deep'
'Cause if you wanna go to Heaven all you gotta do is pay to pray

Joining a fan club with my pen
Filling my bathtub with holy water and amens
He looks so dreamy, I'm in love from afar
When I'm pickin' up a fallen star

Shake that woody, shake it for me, St. Pinocchio
You've paid your money, now watch that money grow

Joining a fan club, best be warned
He turns me on when he wears that lampshade crown of thorns
We'd be so dreamy, sharing his black caviar
While I'm pickin' up a fallen star

Joining a fan club is a big mistake
I still get heartburn when I think about all of the stamps I ate
I wished I'd loved him, before fate crashed his car
Say a prayer for the fallen star