Jehovah's Most Secret Witness

[Intro- Abed/Danny Pudi]
What if you were a Jehovah's witness
That was merely pretending to be into Christmas
Gathering clues and blending in
To take down the holidays from within

[Troy Barnes]
You mean like a spy investigating?
Making it seem like I'm celebrating?
When actually I'm infiltrating
Santa's operation?

[Abed/Danny Pudi]
Yoip!

[Verse 1: Troy Barnes]
Going deep covert, past enemy lines
Making everybody think I'm on the Christmas side
Rocking warm sweaters, hanging big ass lights
If the fat man can see me, yo it's gotta look bright
I'd watch all the T.V. specials that I never could
I'll even cry during the sad ones, like James Bond would
And when the big night comes it's time to set the bait
Cold milk, Hot cookies, decorative plate!
And he'll come down the chimney it'll just be him and me
But he won't know we're enemies cause I play sincere
Bring a trap like that, hug him tight get on his lap and tell him
He can come back every year
Cause I am Jehovah's most secret witness
So I might have to dedicate my life to Christmas
And act just like I love it 'till the day I die

[Abed/danny pudi]
A-B-E-D
Connoisseur of Christmas
On the spectrum, none of your business
Thoughts too fast to comprehend
Just wanna do right, by my friends
If years were seasons, this December
Would be the December of our December
More blueprints than Howard Hughes
But if there are blue prints, how do we choose?
We have to be happy to get to the end
We have to save Christmas to save our friends

[Both]
We have to save Christmas to save our friends
We have to save Christmas to save our friends

[Annie/ Alison Brie]
Hey guys
Rapping?