If That Isn't Love

Ooh Yeah, ooh

I'm the shelter from the storm
You know you'll always have my back
I'll even let you warm your freezing hands inside my buttcrack.
I never get out my leaf blower when Oprah is on
When you're telling me about your feelings, I try not to yawn.
And when we're at parties, I don't talk about your spastic bladder.
When you're cleaning the garters on the roof, I'll hold the ladder.

And if that isn't love,
If that isn't love,
If that isn't love, I don't know what love is.
Na na na na na na na na (No no no no no I guess I don't know)
Na na na na na na na na (Ooooh, listen now)

There's a microscopic bit of milk left in the refrigerator.
I could've finished it off, but I quit it in case you wanted a tiny little sip for later,
And if you cut the cheese, then maybe we can say the dog's to blame.
And I'll make sure to call you "baby" every time I forget your name.
I'll even tell your girl when you start looking fat.
'Cuz all your so-called friends will probably neglect to mention that.

And if that isn't love,
If that isn't love,
If that isn't love, I don't know what love is.
Na na na na na na na na (No no no no no well, then I don't know)
Na na na na na na na na (Ooooh, no)

Even though you make me sit through Mamma Mia, well I still adore you.
I'll kiss you even if you had omelettes for breakfast, and I can't stand omelettes.
After I take a bath if it's still warm, I'll leave the water in there for you.
I'll give you my word, you're so beautiful, you make a glorious sunset look like a big fat turd, yeah.

Everytime I see you trying to lift some really heavy thing
You can always count on me to help by saying something encouraging
If you get drunk and pass out I'll never sharpie up your face
And I don't wipe my nose on your couch even though that's a super convenient place
I totally support every idiotic thing you do.
And I almost never pretend you're someone else when I'm making out with you.

And if that isn't love,
If that isn't love,
If that isn't love, I don't know what love is.
Na na na na na na na na (No I don't know what love is)
Na na na na na na na na (Well I don't know what love is)
Na na na na na na na na (I don't know what love is!)