I Wonder

That's right I got problems and personal issues
Stories that'll make ya, eyes tear and wet tissue
It's true, I'm Madd like the Rapper
I'm so upset I gotta put it up in my rap before I snapper

After the things I've seen from Atlanta to Queens
To the mean streets of Brooklyn when I was a teen
Back and forth to the Islands, scream when I left
But adapted, and still my dreams haven't left

I only hung with the crack kids we not the best
Me and the ruffest ruffnecks went chest to chest
Now my best friend's locked up north I wont rest
'Til I let him live his dream threw me and I confess

That even though both our hearts was dark his was darker
Best believe when shit got spark he was the sparker
And when the block got hot he was the fire starter
And if I had beef my nigga Roger was a martyr

I wonder, how certain people come in my life
I wonder, why'd I get in so many fights
I wonder, why sometimes things just don't go right
Why I gotta live this life, hey hey

I wonder, how certain people come in my life
I wonder, why'd I get in so many fights
I wonder
Why I gotta live this life, hey hey

Yo, you one of the most important people in my life
They called you Dice but I called you cousin
We was buggin' 'cause I figured that we both had something in common
You loved to chat reggae music and I loved rhymin'

But still they ain't call you Dice for nuttin'
I seen you shoot with the wiliest cats and leave them with nothing
Somethin' must have pleased that bluffer in you
To make you wanna take dough from those tougher than you

Threw out school we made money together
When you was on the floor shootin', I was the side better
And yo we cleaned out them cats and took the scraps
But you wasn't a ruff cat and cats knew that

I knew eventually them thugs would try to hurt you
If I was there, I'd never let nobody hurt you, it's hurtful
I knew they wouldn't let you take the money and run
That's why I shoulda came when you told me to come

I wonder, how certain people come in my life
I wonder, why'd I get in so many fights
I wonder
Why I gotta live this life, hey hey

I wonder, how certain things don't go right
I wonder, why'd I get in so many fights
I wonder
why I gotta live this life, hey hey

Yo, it was June sixth '96, graduation night
Made it threw the school swish shootin' dice gettin' in fights
I even sparked a riot, 'til the school got quiet
And dismiss just got tired of usin' my fists

We had some shit like knife pipes bottles and sticks
Can't forget them 380's, nine's and 22's
Best believe, many dudes was paid in my crew
We made a name for ourselves boy I've seen some drama

Seems my momma never dreamed she'd go threw so much trauma
Comma, pause you ask about cops and laws
Well that shit don't exist when you black and poor
So we broke 'em, but at that night my heart got broken

Choken on the weed smoke drinkin' rum and gettin' open
Not to mention, never a big drinker I'm a thinker
But I'm thinkin' hey dis my night, pass me more liquor
Fight breaks out, I'm just too nice to get in it

But my brother got stabbed and I missed it
Word up, its crazy
why I gotta live this life, hey hey
(Wonder)

I wonder, why sometimes things just don't go right
I wonder, why certain people come in my life
I wonder, yeah
Why I gotta live this life, hey hey

I wonder, why sometimes things just don't go right
I wonder, why'd I get in so many fights
I wonder
Hey, why I gotta live this life, hey hey

I wonder, why sometimes things just don't go right
I wonder, why I gotta live this life
I wonder
Why I gotta live this life, ay ay uh ay

That's right
Your life