I'd Like To Have A Problem Like That

I'm not a wealthy man, don't pay for my suntan
I work out in the heat and the cold
Sometimes, I'd like to be the big, bad wolf
Instead of just another sheep in the fold

I hear the rich man holler 'bout the shrinkin' dollar
Cry about a luxury tax
They won't let him write off his little eighty foot yacht
I'd like to have a problem like that

Oh, I'd like to have a problem like that
Should I buy the Porsche or the stretch, Cadillac?
Do I wanna drive fast or just ride around in the back?
I'd like to have a problem like that

I saw a celebrity talkin' on the TV
He looked like a tall Tom Cruise
He's seein' Sheila and Bambi, Linda and Candy
Burnin' both ends of his fuse

He said he's suffocatin', needs a vacation
He can't find time to relax from all the kissin'
And huggin', the sweet talk and lovin'
I'd like to have a problem like that

Oh, I'd like to have a problem like that
Be a one-man woman jugglin' act
How many can you keep in the air before you lose track?
I'd like to have a problem like that

I'd like to be too rich, I'd to be too thin
I'd like to be too young, I'd like to be too in
Should I kiss and tell and write a book on my life?
How much can I get for the movie rights?

Oh, I'd like to have a problem like that
Be a tabloid star at the checkout rack
Should I drag 'em through court or tell 'em to kiss my fax?
I'd like to have a problem like that

Give me those problems
I think that I could solve 'em
I'd like to have a problem like that

Sure would like to have a problem like that
Don't know what they're whining about
Let them get out here and [Incomprehensible] steel for a living