Hippies in Calgary

Well a few years back
Me and ol' John worked the Calgary rodeo
We were hangin' around town with nothing to do
And nowhere else to go

And cowboys are known for their fun loving ways
Pranks and practical jokes
And I'll never forget the night we impressed
A bunch of them Calgary folks

Well just down the hall in the ole hotel
Where me and old John stayed
Were some school marms
They'd come up from Dallas
To party for a couple of days

Now these old gals was fancy dressers
They had wigs and beads and all
So we put on my hair and took off our boots
And boogied on down the hall

Well you could never tell we were cowboys
We were real lookin' hippies by heck
With long hair, bare feet and old t-shirts
And beads around our necks

And sure we just had to show someone
So we boogied on down to the lounge
There was cowboys and gents in nice old suits
And ladies in long evening gowns

Well we found us a table and pulled out a chair
And lit up some Bull Durham smokes
The smoke filled the air, everyone there
Thought these hippies were smokin' dope

Now Leonard and Cravy and old Ronnie Roseland
Were sitting two tables away
So we did what we thought that hippies would do
When we noticed them lookin' our way

Well we waved our long hair and rolled back our eyes
And sucked in them home made smokes
Sayin' stuff like cool and ya, man wow
We put on one heck of a show

Now Ronnie and Lenard, they'd been there a while
And they wasn't feelin' much pain
Now reckon they figured they'd have some fun
With these two hippie freaks that walked in

Well the bar got deathly quiet
As those cowboys come our way
And those city folks knew it wouldn't be long
Till the battle got under way

Now Ronnie he came right over to me
And he looked me right square in the eye
He said, "Hey there boy, whats that stuff you're smokin'"
I said, "Here man give it a try"

Well that didn't make him too happy
And then when I told him to bug out
He blinked and snorted like a mad brahamer bull
And frolicked and foamed at the mouth

Well just about then, I looked at old John
And his face had turned a beat red
'Cause Leonard had grabbed him right by the throat
With plans to tear off his head

Now Ronnie reached out with a huge left hand
And grabbed a hold of my hair
With his right fist cocked, he said now boy
You better start sayin' your prayers

Well he gave the yank and my wig come off
And lay limp there across his hand
The most stupefied look I've never seen
On the face of any man

Well he dropped the thing like a poisonous snake
And stared at it there on the floor
Then he looked up at me and saw who I was
And he laughed, he gave out a roar

Well this story doesn't have any moral
It was just one mighty good gag
But I sighed with relief Ronnie didn't swing first
Before he pulled off my wig