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Here they come down main street, drums a flailin' and the a wailin', what a roar
Bands are a playin' and flags are a waivin, and the Vanguard's and Motorcycle
Clowns are a clownin' to the crowd and pinchin' every pretty girl who to smile
It's a glorious mess, everybody wears a fez the parade out for a mile.

It's a typical American phenomenon where all the members have a old time
It's the annual Convention of the Grand Mystic Royal Order
Of the Nobles of the Ali Baba Temple of the

Meanwhile at the Motel.....

"Hello, Operator, give me 321, please.
Hello, Noble Lumpkin? This here is the Potentate.
I said it's the illustrious Potentate....The Illustrious...Coy! Dad blame it! here's Bubba!

Coy, why an't you at the parade?! What?! Well, how'd you get that big Harley up there in your
What?! I can't ya' Coy! Quit revvin' it up, son! Turn it off! Listen I just want you to know one thing. You have embarrassed us all, the whole Hahira Delegation!
Now I'll see you at the banquet tonight, son. And you be there Coy, you hear me? Black tie! Seven o'clock! Be there, Coy! And Coy, don't the phone, udden udden!"
Well, it was all arranged by the Auxiliary in the downtown Convention Hall
Roast Beef, String Beans, Mashed Potatoes and nine boring speeches in all.
And all the tables looked fine with their David Wine and Chrysanthemums on each side.
And the Hahira leaders in their rented Tuxedos made the hearts swell with pride!


It's a typical American phenomenon where all the members have a old time
It's the forty-third annual Convention of the Grand Mystic Order
Of the Nobles of the Ali Baba Temple of the

Meanwhile at the Motel.....

"Operator, 321, please. You.
Hello, Coy? are you doin'?!
What do you mean, who is this! This is Bubba? Why you at the banquet?
What do you mean all you had to wear was a flowerdy shirt?
Well, you may think foolin' some people, but Ever'body seen the little redhead. That's right, ever'body!
Why she come runnin' right through the dinner, in the middle of the pineapple sherbet. Didn't have nothin' on but your fez, Coy!
Coy, you the only one's got a fez with a propeller on top!! Yeah, yeah and she was a out the secret code, too, Coy.
We gonna have to change it now, Dad blame it, Coy! We gonna have to have a special meetin', we get to Hahira, about your conduct at this here convention.
Embarrassin'!! Now Coy, you be at the secret conclave tonight! You me?! And keep it a secret! Hah"

Well, it was a secret meeting in the dead of the night with mysterious
In accordance with prescribed rituals of honored ceremony
Matters of concern were weighed with dedicated caution
whether or not to raise at stud or draw or spit in the ocean

It's a typical American phenomenon where all the members have a old time
It's the forty-third annual Convention of the Grand Mystic Royal
Of the Nobles of the Ali Baba of the Shrine

Meanwhile at the Motel.....

"Operator, three-twenty...Uh, H-How'd you know?
Oh! Hello! Coy? Where have you
No, you wasn't at the meeting! Well, I found out that at three o'clock this mornin' you was out there in your Fruit of the in the motel swimmin' pool with a bunch of them waitresses from the cocktail lounge!
I just hope don't find out about this, Coy!
What? Well, how'd you get that big motorcycle up on the high dive, Coy?
Now Coy, dad it, that ain't no way to act. We supposed to be pillars of the community.
we get back to Hahira you can just turn in your ring and your tie tack 'cause Coy, heh-heh, you are out of the Shrine!
That's right! You have to pack your bags and leave town! You gonn be black-balled, Coy! What do you mean you might join the Hell's Angels?
Coy! Coy! Don't you up on me! Don't you crank that motorcycle! Who's that gigglin' in the background, Coy?
Huh? Hello, hello operator! we was cut off! Yeah, room 321. Coy! you hang up on me!
I'm the Illustrious Potentate! This is the IP, Coy! is Bubba! Coy! Bubba! Coy!............."

Videos

Ray Stevens - Hang Up and Drive
Ray Stevens - Hang Up and Drive
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Ray Stevens - "Hang Up And Drive" (Live on CabaRay Nashville)
Ray Stevens - Hang Up And Drive
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Ray Stevens - "Too Drunk To Fish" (Music Video)
Ray Stevens - "Sittin' Up With The Dead" (Music Video)
Ray Stevens - "Sittin' Up With The Dead" (Music Video)
Ray Stevens - Box Set (Full Album)
Ray Stevens - Box Set (Full Album)
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Junior Brown performs "Hang Up And Drive" Live on the Texas Music Scene
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Ray Stevens - "The Mississippi Squirrel Revival" (Music Video)
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Ray Stevens- Box Set CD 1
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