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One, two, three,

I spy for the spirit of
All the scandals of vain monstrosity
I and I pry and I insinuate
If the failure is great then it to fascinate

A tornado dropped a funnel cloud with twenty tons of
Though she had the span of warm cellophane
Her lovers fell like skittles in a 10 pin lane
But nothing compare with that explosion of fame

So you jumped with alarm
Every Elvis has his army, every rattlesnake its
Can you still hear me? Am I coming through fine?
Your memory was buried in a simple box of

Did her green eyes seduce you and you get so weak?
Was there fire engine red that she upon your cheek?
It's a shame you had to break the heart you could have counted on
But the last thing you need is another of blonde

Revolving like a jeweler's on a music box
Spangled curtain and a night-club scene unlocks
and fixed and fastened in a follow spot
Arms thrown out to everyone, she's all she's got

To the last gasp of a bandeon
A tiny man imploring to the ceiling fan this stolen
up through a busted speaker
Blaring, blasting, advertising, distorted reason

Into the street where petty crime-coats panic drunkards
Half out of the cab the barker seized my elbow
He thought I was lonely, likely pilgrim looking for St. Elmo

Did her green eyes seduce you and you get so weak?
Was there fire engine red that she left your cheek?
It's such a shame you had to break the heart you have counted on
But the thing you need is another episode of blonde

I tried to keep a face but you know it never pays
He would stare into those eyes and vacation in her gaze
She was a cute little ruin that he pulled out of the
Now they are both in a soft soap bubble

The film producer's contemplating, suicide
The picture crumpled in his fist, his child bride
The timepiece stretched his wrist
She couldn't care less cast

The scent that so him that he swore, insecticide
And there's a farewell note to
That will conclude, 'Your Son
Oh, your other children not to do as I have done'

Did her green eyes seduce you and you get so weak?
Was there fire engine red that she upon your cheek?
It's a shame, it's such a shame, shame, shame, shame
Shame you had to break the heart you could counted on
But the last thing you need, this last thing you
Is another episode of blonde, it's another of blonde
Oh it's another episode of

So an artist drags a toothbrush across the first thing he sees
And names the "Christ's Last Exit into Purgatory"
Receiving secret messages an alien intelligence
And off his stalker it's a legitimate expense

So paste up pictures of those shrill and hollow girls with lips
She's a trophy on your arm a magnet for your clip
The moral of story is the sorry tale to say
They're pieced with links of chains so they can run away

Videos

Episode Of Blonde (Album Version)
Episode Of Blonde (Album Version)
ELVIS COSTELLO - EPISODE OF BLONDE LIVE
ELVIS COSTELLO - EPISODE OF BLONDE LIVE
ELVIS COSTELLO & THE ATTRACTIONS: "She" and "Episode of blonde"
ELVIS COSTELLO & THE ATTRACTIONS: "She" and "Episode of blonde"
Episode Of Blonde (Live)
Episode Of Blonde (Live)
Episode Of Blonde - Elvis Costello (With Lyrics)
Episode Of Blonde - Elvis Costello (With Lyrics)
Episode of Blonde by Elvis Costello
Episode of Blonde by Elvis Costello
Episode of Blonde   Montreal Jazz Festival 2006   6min01sec
Episode of Blonde Montreal Jazz Festival 2006 6min01sec
ELVIS COSTELLO & THE RUDE 5 : Studio Live 1991
ELVIS COSTELLO & THE RUDE 5 : Studio Live 1991
Elvis Costello & The Attractions - Pump It Up
Elvis Costello & The Attractions - Pump It Up
Elvis Costello Episode of Blonde
Elvis Costello Episode of Blonde
Elvis Costello Plays Penny Lane for Sir Paul at the White House
Elvis Costello Plays Penny Lane for Sir Paul at the White House
Elvis Costello Episode of Blonde Los Angeles Greek Theater 8/5/19
Elvis Costello Episode of Blonde Los Angeles Greek Theater 8/5/19
Elvis Costello: His Master's Voice (2002)
Elvis Costello: His Master's Voice (2002)
Elvis Costello Takes The Colbert Questionert
Elvis Costello Takes The Colbert Questionert
At 70, Elvis Costello EXPOSES Agnetha Faltskog
At 70, Elvis Costello EXPOSES Agnetha Faltskog
Elvis Costello Watched Peter Jackson's "Get Back" With Paul McCartney And Ringo Starr
Elvis Costello Watched Peter Jackson's "Get Back" With Paul McCartney And Ringo Starr
Elvis Costello "Episode Of Blonde" Asheville 7/19/11
Elvis Costello "Episode Of Blonde" Asheville 7/19/11
Elvis Costello - Radio Radio - SNL original footage 1977 (first portion only)
Elvis Costello - Radio Radio - SNL original footage 1977 (first portion only)
Elvis Costello & The Attractions - (What's So Funny 'Bout) Peace, Love And Understanding
Elvis Costello & The Attractions - (What's So Funny 'Bout) Peace, Love And Understanding
Elvis Costello - When I Was Cruel (2002)
Elvis Costello - When I Was Cruel (2002)