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One, two, three,

I spy for the of curiosity
All the scandals of each vain
I gossip and I pry and I
If the failure is then it tends to fascinate

A tornado a funnel cloud with twenty tons of rain
Though she had the attention span of cellophane
Her lovers like skittles in a 10 pin bowling lane
But nothing could compare with explosion of fame

So you jumped back with
Every Elvis has his army, every its charm
Can you still hear me? Am I coming just fine?
Your was buried in a simple box of pine

Did her green eyes seduce you and make you get so
Was there engine red that she left upon your cheek?
It's a shame you had to break the heart you could have counted on
But the last thing you need is another episode of

Revolving a jeweler's figure on a music box
Spangled parted and a night-club scene unlocks
and fixed and fastened in a follow spot
Arms thrown out to everyone, she's giving all got

To the last gasp of a bandeon
A tiny man imploring to the ceiling fan this stolen
Amplified up a busted speaker
Blaring, blasting, advertising, distorted reason

Into the street where petty crime-coats panic drunkards
Half out of the cab the barker seized my elbow
He thought I was lonely, likely pilgrim looking for St. Elmo

Did her green eyes you and make you get so weak?
Was there fire engine red that she left your cheek?
such a shame you had to break the heart you could have counted on
But the last thing you need is another episode of

I tried to keep a straight face but you know it pays
He would stare into those and then vacation in her gaze
She was a cute little ruin he pulled out of the rubble
Now are both living in a soft soap bubble

The film producer's contemplating, suicide
The picture crumpled in his fist, his runaway child
The timepiece stretched across his
She care less cast aside

The scent that so repelled him that he swore,
And there's a note to mother
That conclude, 'Your loving Son
Oh, tell your other not to do as I have done'

Did her green eyes you and make you get so weak?
Was fire engine red that she left upon your cheek?
It's such a shame, it's such a shame, shame, shame,
you had to break the heart you could have counted on
But the thing you need, this last thing you want
Is episode of blonde, it's another episode of blonde
Oh it's episode of blonde

So an artist a toothbrush across the first thing that he sees
And names the painting "Christ's Last Exit Purgatory"
Receiving secret messages an alien intelligence
And paying off his stalker it's a expense

So up pictures of those shrill and hollow girls with puckered lips
She's a trophy on your arm a magnet for your money
The moral of this is the sorry tale to say
They're pieced with links of chains so they can run away

Videos

Episode Of Blonde (Album Version)
Episode Of Blonde (Album Version)
ELVIS COSTELLO - EPISODE OF BLONDE LIVE
ELVIS COSTELLO - EPISODE OF BLONDE LIVE
ELVIS COSTELLO & THE ATTRACTIONS: "She" and "Episode of blonde"
ELVIS COSTELLO & THE ATTRACTIONS: "She" and "Episode of blonde"
Episode Of Blonde (Live)
Episode Of Blonde (Live)
Episode Of Blonde - Elvis Costello (With Lyrics)
Episode Of Blonde - Elvis Costello (With Lyrics)
Episode of Blonde by Elvis Costello
Episode of Blonde by Elvis Costello
Episode of Blonde   Montreal Jazz Festival 2006   6min01sec
Episode of Blonde Montreal Jazz Festival 2006 6min01sec
ELVIS COSTELLO & THE RUDE 5 : Studio Live 1991
ELVIS COSTELLO & THE RUDE 5 : Studio Live 1991
Elvis Costello & The Attractions - Pump It Up
Elvis Costello & The Attractions - Pump It Up
Elvis Costello Episode of Blonde
Elvis Costello Episode of Blonde
Elvis Costello Plays Penny Lane for Sir Paul at the White House
Elvis Costello Plays Penny Lane for Sir Paul at the White House
Elvis Costello Episode of Blonde Los Angeles Greek Theater 8/5/19
Elvis Costello Episode of Blonde Los Angeles Greek Theater 8/5/19
Elvis Costello: His Master's Voice (2002)
Elvis Costello: His Master's Voice (2002)
Elvis Costello Takes The Colbert Questionert
Elvis Costello Takes The Colbert Questionert
At 70, Elvis Costello EXPOSES Agnetha Faltskog
At 70, Elvis Costello EXPOSES Agnetha Faltskog
Elvis Costello Watched Peter Jackson's "Get Back" With Paul McCartney And Ringo Starr
Elvis Costello Watched Peter Jackson's "Get Back" With Paul McCartney And Ringo Starr
Elvis Costello "Episode Of Blonde" Asheville 7/19/11
Elvis Costello "Episode Of Blonde" Asheville 7/19/11
Elvis Costello - Radio Radio - SNL original footage 1977 (first portion only)
Elvis Costello - Radio Radio - SNL original footage 1977 (first portion only)
Elvis Costello & The Attractions - (What's So Funny 'Bout) Peace, Love And Understanding
Elvis Costello & The Attractions - (What's So Funny 'Bout) Peace, Love And Understanding
Elvis Costello - When I Was Cruel (2002)
Elvis Costello - When I Was Cruel (2002)