Enemy

I need advice it's true
but I won't hear it from you
I don't remember when
you last cared for the things I did

I wish I could believe
apply all the sides you've seen
or you could be the only one
who knows the truth of me

am I the ugly one
it's easy to see past
all of the kindness that you've offered me
it doesn't last

it's just a thought I've had
if I could show you how
I came to think this way
maybe you'd understand me now

sometimes our enemies
are closer than we think
sometimes the ones we trust
may have to give up listening

I wish it were the same
as it is in my mind
I'd lie to learn a thing or two
give me a reason why

why am I not ashamed
while I am standing still
you want to move in me like you did before
but I've had my fill

you say your time has changed
that you have faced defeat
we might be older now
but is it changing anything

it could be in a way
we've learned to carry well
oh how I wish I could
remove this doubt I feel somehow

I want the best for you
so I won't look your way
maybe the clouds will clear
and I'll be seeing you someday

I wish it were the same
as it is in my mind
I am lighter on my feet
when I've left some things behind