Don't Tempt Me

That gorilla you're dancing with
May not have too long to live
He's putting his hands in the wrong places
It's time to rearrange his face
He's gonna dance with me instead
And I'm gonna tap dance on his head

Don't tempt me, don't tempt me, don't tempt me
I'm half way out of my seat

He's got the looks, he's got the lolly
Driving me clean off my trolley
Doing the jitterbug, doing the jive
Doing the shimmy, snakes alive
That's not a dance, that's S E X
Ban that couple, certificate X

Don't tempt me, don't tempt me, don't tempt me
I'm half way out of my seat

Oh, I'm a patient man, but it's out of hand
If there's one thing that I can't stand

Get your mittens off my gal
Or you'll end up as mincemeat, pal
I've got friends, mean sons
They've got knives, chains, guns
Gas grenades, knuckle-dusters
Lazy Susans, blockbusters

Don't tempt me, don't tempt me, don't tempt me
I'm half way out of my seat, oh

I'm sitting here calm as I can
While you polish the floor with another man
I'm not mad, I'm a cuddly toy
Just keep me away from a laughing boy
You say he's a relative, some hope
If he's your uncle, I'm the Pope

Don't tempt me, don't tempt me, don't tempt me
I'm half way out of my seat, oh