Don't Have

(Check, check, check)
This is a little insight into my life
If you wanna listen...
Welcome to the show

Watch movies all night, I sleep all day
Don't have a job, so I don't get paid
Don't have money, so I don't get laid
Don't have a honey, so I have no maid

Gotta do my laundry, make my food
Gotta wipe my ass and not act rude (Christopher Sean!)
Two shakes of piss off my leg, off my shlong
Missed the blong cause it's not too long

Forgot to flush
So the room smells funky
Now, back to bed and probably just spank the monkey
Don't have no woman, so I get no loving

Don't catch my chicken and put it in the oven
Wearing dirty clothes out a giant dirty hamper

Still smell like shit
Didn't have no paper
Use my other sock since this one's scum
Don't have a job so they say I'm dumb

Don't have a mortgage or a couple of bills
So I don't have to stress over a bottle of pills

I don't have to live, so can I ever die?
Don't wear a cross, will I ever crucify?
Don't have no wrists, can I ever commit suicide?
(Oh boy)

Don't have a body, does that mean that I'm godly?
Gotta bucket of chicken wings, does it mean I could fly?
Not dressed in a suit, am I still a guy?
Just checked her out, does it mean I gotta buy?

These giants don't play, I think they got a bye

This week my tattoo's fading
Does that mean I should go get some shading?
I dreamt I was the sun shining life onto the planet
Who am I? Do I have a parent?

Just chasing my holy shamrock
My ol' lucky, lucky shamrock
(Lucky, Lucky shamrock)