Don't Ask Me Why

There are those who manage such a charmed existence
Lucky ladies who've been fortunate since birth
All the major domos know them and obligingly will show them
Straight to the only table left on earth

These are people for whom life is not a challenge
They've got savior-faire that oozes pedigree
They're the women men will die for and millionaires will buy for
But I fear these ladies aren't me

The cake life served me is upside down
The soup du jour I'm having spills on my best gown
I get all wet each time I surf the net
Yet baby, don't ask me why

It always rains on my one day off
And my blind date turned into Boris Karloff
It's lie a curse, I go from bad to worse
But baby, don't ask me why

Funny, down at the IRS I get the guy who never says, "Yes"
God, what a mess, it's all so taxing
Maybe life is a cosmic gaff
Fashioning punch lines into a laugh, too cute by half

I don't know, don't ask me, and then I saw you that rainy day
Drenched to the bone and all alone, what can I say
When you are near my motor hits high gear, dear
No clue, don't ask me why

Maybe this is the perfect deal
This time the schmo has found her schlemiel
Now maybe we'll find that happy ending
Maybe you are the missing cog
Maybe the princess lost in the fog
Kiss the one frog who was worth befriending

The world will go on much as before
I'll lose the keys right after you lock the door
It seems to me that we were meant to be, see
We've got compatibility

You're the pie and I'm the face
You're the shoe tripping on my lace
You're the yin and I'm the yang
You're the lemon and I'm meringue

You're the fourth of my July
Together we'll blow sky high
And we'll never say goodbye
But baby, don't ask me why

Why don't elephants fly?
Why are high heels so high?
Why is Ru Paul a guy?
Baby, don't ask me why